Brandon Leatham

Profile Updated: December 26, 2008
Residing In: undisclosed Congo
Occupation: Mountain Man
Children: I do have about 12-13 children. They are scattered out across the U.S. and parts of Canada, Mexico, More…Jamaica, Cayman Islands, and I think 1 or 2 in Amsterdam.
Yes! Attending Reunion

I use to have a job as a stock broker but the after the embezzlement ACCUSATIONS (which I am innocent) I had to leave every thing I had in New York. I had a very nice condo on 5th ave with all professionally decorated interior. I do miss the Ferrari every now and then.

I do like living up in the hills now though. I have almost completed my cabin. It's a little rough on the outside because it's hard to find large trees close to me. Most of it is made from dead logs about the size of your arm. It sure beats sleeping without shelter(especially since I sleep naked).

Some of the time I have to chase my meals for 5-8 miles before the arrow kills them but they sure taste good. I would like to share this recipe with all of you:
1- large Rockchuck or 3 small ground squirrels
9- Large handfuls of wild berries
2- leftover pieces of bear meat
6- Medium size pine cones
3- Gallons of stream water or melted snow
(white snow not yellow)
Bring the water, bear meat, and berries to a rolling boil. Add Rockchuck and pine cones simmering for about 2 hours. Then put pine cones in a bowl and divide the portions accordingly.

Before I left New York I did have some cosmetic surgery do. It turned out very good I think. I got a new nose, chin, cheek implants, tummy tuck, and a brow lift. I wish I could say the same for the surgery in Mexico. That doctor padded his resume a little I think. He said his portfolio includes several movie stars(I later found out it was on thier pets). The sex change was the last and only one I will get in Mexico. As long as it's dark outside and I have clothes on it looks good. The other bad part about that surgery is the parts he used were from 3 different people so the colors don't match so well.

Livin up here in the mountains is not too bad not to mention without an adress the IRS and child support people can't find me. The IRS says I owe them around $5,249,988 in taxes plus interest. It is unconstitutional to require taxes on income. They child support people say I owe them about $934,984 for all the kids. Most of the kids have jobs by now probably so why should I have to support them?

I am not sure if all the warrants have an expiration day but I should be ok if I don't get caught before 2074. The only ones I am concerned with are the murder charges. I skipped bail before the judge decided because that other lawyer guy made it sound like I did it. So I don't know how that turned out. If any of you are lawyers and have some advice please let me know. I only get to internet about every 2-3 years but I am optomistic.

It is kinda lonely up here but this cute lil mountain goat has been coming around lately. So it may all work out.

I would like to close with the following note: